When writing this article, it gave me a lot of thought of how much certain women truly don’t know their clitoris like they should.
Women know more about how to put on makeup or only how to make themselves feel good only on the outside, but to feel good on the inside will also show on the outside.
As women, how much do you pay attention to the inside of yourself?
This question is not just for Lesbians, it’s for all women (heterosexuals you’re included too). In the past, I noticed a lot of women don’t pay attention.
One thing I would expect women to know about is their clitoris. It’s that little spot that sits at the peak of your vagina that jumps at times when someone or something sparks your affection.
Women don’t get all uncomfortable on me. Why become uncomfortable when talking about your clitoris? I talk about my clitoris all the time. When it’s a topic of discussion, of course. Women get so uncomfortable or they expect their man or partner to know their body for them. No, sweetheart.
All Women Please Hear Me and Listen!
You have to know yourself better than anyone before someone can make you feel good.
How do you expect any man or woman to show affection to you when you don’t show it to yourself?
Some women feel when other women are “freaks”. Well, why aren’t you? It’s nothing wrong with being a little freaky in your own special way. It’s all about what your body wants.
Think about it:
What if there was no way for you to penetrate, only stimulate?
I truly want to know your comments on that question. Reason why I asked, I noticed a lot of women forget about that sweet soft rose bud. Ladies, knowing we have two ways to climax. Why only use one? However, if you stimulate your clitoris the right way, there wouldn’t be a point to penetrate.
“I can’t do that”!
OK, I know some women are saying a lot. “I got to have penetration, I can’t get off if I don’t”! Or, “I don’t have a sensitive clitoris anymore“!
Well, STOP lying to yourself!
That is not true at all. I’ve seen it too many times to know. You have to give yourself patience for your body to open up to you. I know that sounds crazy. When you’re frustrated, you can’t think clearly. When you’re calm, you think clearly.
How many women get frustrated just playing with themselves?
You feel it so bad but can’t get to that feeling. Some women think something is wrong with them because of that frustration. Thus, choosing penetration. There’s nothing wrong with you at all. You just forgot how to show your body patience.
A Great Moment is Noticing the Feeling of Your Clitoris
I can remember one vivid moment, when I was 16 years old. I traveled to New York to visit family. My niece which was older than me, wanted to take me to get my nails done. Not ever have I had my nails done.
In this girly stage of my life, I proceeded along with excitement.
Upon arrival, this wasn’t your ordinary nail shop(which in my area now, there are only Asian nail shops).
This was an Indian nail shop. I was kind of scared because I didn’t know what to expect. Not ever have I been in a nail shop like this one or could remember upon leaving New York at an early age.
When it was my turn, the pretty Indian girl (in her mid 20s) asked for me to follow her.
She was very pretty, so that calmed my nerves a little. In the process of my manicure, one part stood out the most. It was right at the end when you get your hands moisturized with whatever lotion they use.
As she took each hand to put lotion on, one at a time, my body was feeling aroused for some reason.
I didn’t understand know why, until I noticed the way she was putting the lotion on my hands.
The way she rubbed my hand, caressing each finger. My body was tingling and jumping in places, I really didn’t understand. I didn’t want her to stop, I liked the way it felt. I tried my best to keep still so she wouldn’t see my face.
My face said it all though. I couldn’t control my facial expressions.
Thankfully the pretty Indian girl wasn’t paying me any attention. She was so focused on my hands. I know, it was just my hands.
I couldn’t control the way I was feeling and didn’t know why. Not ever had I sensed that kind of throbbing feeling from someone (a female) just putting lotion on my hands.
It was just a manicure, that’s it!
I hated that it was over, though. I kept looking at her, like she did something to me. This felt surreal, I didn’t fully understand the feeling but I really liked it.
After leaving the nail shop, all I could think about is why did my body do that when she was putting lotion on my hands.
It was patience.
My mind was open to curiosity and her patience of what she was going to do. Even though, she may or may not of known what she was doing to me. She did something to me. I still wanted to know what that feeling was about.
Understand My Clitoris More
Yep! I found out more of what that feeling was, my clitoris.
I started to understand what that feeling was and how to use that pulsation so much, where I didn’t have to touch myself to climax.
When I told some girlfriends in a conversation, they thought that couldn’t be true.
Then, they came to the assumption of all lesbians can do that or because I never had a child.
Nope, that’s not true either.
I always looked at my body differently because when dealing with men I didn’t like how they made my body feel.
When I dated men, I really never got the satisfaction other women got being intimate with a man. I didn’t understand the hype.
Thus, I searched for my own satisfaction within myself. I went back to the drawing board to figure this out.
Show and Tell
So, I understood I had to show and tell my partner, what my body likes.
Dealing with men in this situation was so frustrating to me. I was being patient as he wasn’t with me. Being with a woman is soft and there’s patience.
At this point in my life, I began to date a woman.
Yet, I was still scared to show or tell my feelings and emotions. I was still figuring out all these feelings I was having.
The woman I was dating was more open with herself( you can say she was a freak).
I learned from her, not to fear what feels good to you. That’s all that it is.
When you’re alone or with someone, don’t fear what makes your body feel good.
Touching yourself is not a bad thing whatsoever. It relieves stress. Your imagination is the key to it all. Think of those thoughts of freaky fantasies you won’t tell a soul about.
Take it slowly, don’t allow your fantasy to control you. You have to control it. Tease yourself. It can be just rubbing your legs together or slowly caressing your arms. Soft music or a glass of wine helps with this.
Have you ever got in the mood for yourself? Why not?
You know what you like. Try it out, let me know how it turns out for you. Does this help you? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Please don’t think this is just a “get-off” method. For women, it’s actually more than that. I will get into that in another post.
It helps with your vagina muscles. Don’t think women can’t get that feeling of pain that men get called, “blue balls” for nothing. It maybe called something else in women terms. Believe me when I say, you can get that same painful feeling down there when your clitoris becomes aroused. So don’t forget about “her”.
Why do think you have built-up stress sometimes? Let it go ” booboo”, let it go!You’re just hurting your body keeping it in.
Just because you’re not intimate with someone is not a reason. Yes, there are sex toys but to intensify your experience. However, if you don’t know what that feels like from one simple touch of a finger tip, then you or someone has been “gang banging” on your vagina.
Yes, your clitoris can be that sensitive.
Some women told me that’s not true. Well, those same woman “beg to differ” now. I showed them how to make that area sensitive again. No, I didn’t sleep with them to do so. Well, maybe two.
Anyway, I taught them to look at their body differently.
You’re sexual regardless, it doesn’t matter how you look. It matters of how you feel.
The best intimacy you can have is with yourself. Well in my case, it’s for someone to watch me. When you find your clitoris again, then you can teach others how to make you feel.
Before I became intimate with a woman, I always ask what do they like. You can’t assume what someone likes, it maybe a turn-off. No man or woman is the same on how they receive affection.
That’s why size don’t matter in anything. It’s all in the motion that gets the emotion. Make sense?
Do Me A Favor
Try this out to see how you feel afterwards.
It will take a couple of days or a week to do this. This will help you get your clitoris back into sensitive mode.
From the next couple of days, don’t have sex of any kind.
Seriously, fasting on your vagina, lol.
In this time, tease yourself with anything that comes to your imagination. Go to your fantasy world, where anything goes in your mind. And when you’re at that moment, focus on that pulsating feeling that your clitoris will do.
Don’t touch it! Whatever you do, don’t touch it. You can caress your body anywhere else but not there.
Some women may climax from just this because their clitoris is sensitive.
Some women that are used to penetration, this may take longer.
By the third day your clitoris won’t be able to take anymore teasing. Your clitoris should be at the point of trying to stand at attention.
At this point, get yourself in the mood, start with your eyes closed.
Then take the tip of one finger, gracefully press against your clitoris. Your clitoris should be ready to jump out of your skin. Don’t let your clitoris take the show as she may try to.
After your clitoris calms down a little from all the jumping, touch her with your finger tip again.
After a while, you will notice your clitoris likes the gentle touch first. She will let you know when she’s ready to explode but don’t rush it.
Your clitoris has a mood, learn it.
When you understand her emotions better, you control her mood better. Then she will let you know when to rush and when not to.
Give your clitoris a moment of your time to get to know her better. Better than you think you do. Thus, to teach your partner to show affection the way your body wants.
Leave your comments or answers to my questions below. I love to respond to everyone. You’ll never know unless you ask…